the second of becca's jingle poem things:
Once when I was threeI thought that there was nothing better to be
than a "big girl"
with a schedule that was a whirl.
I wanted a job
And some sotra boy, like Bob.
I wanted to have "cool school"
I wanted my life to rule.
I didn't think that that I would care for Mr. Pig anymore.
I didn't think I would need a balloon to soar.
Yet now as I sit here,
If I were to see myself in my mirror,
I would laugh until I was an odd shade of caushmeer.
See, the "big girl" that I so long wanted to be
Isn't me.
I guess what I am trying to say,
Is that on the strange and average day
I am the same little blue-eyed lass
That I wanted to no longer be, but alas
I am not in the straits I wanted
I have jobs, and school,
but no Bob.
(that is not the point of the poem, by the by)
The point is that I have a ballon in my lap
I am sqweezing it with a hard rap
Because, I am the "big girl" that I so long wanted to be.
Ok so that makes no sense and that is ok. I am just having a very very interesting day.
Talk to you later.
posted by Becca @ 10:28 PM
8 Comments:
You are wrong. It did make sense. Though the meter/time in the poem was a little off, it was absolutely beautiful. It really makes you think...maybe we should be careful what we wish for. Instead we should think about how wonderful it is being exactly what we are right now. Though I may not be your Bob, he will come and be so much better than you can possibly have imagined him.
I understand and agree with the point of the poem. Granted, you're right that the poem is a little off (as admirer said, metre isn't perfect) but it expresses your feelings perfectly.
Well I am not trying to be a poem master. I just like to right what I feel. And, when I can put rhyme to it, then it's a little easier to let people read becaust it makes it sorta funny.
Anyways, I just picked the name Bob because, it rhymed and so... yeah. Thanks guys.
It makes plenty of sense. Believe it or not, poems don't necessarily have to rhyme or have perfect rythm and beat. It's not traditional but a poem nonetheless.
Personally, I think your poem was well written and expresses how you feel perfectly.
When at a young age, we wish that we were older and look forward to the day that we actually are. Then we have a totally different perspective. We end up realizing that we had it good at our young age. We had no care in the world really. We just did our simple multiplication and division and should have been content. Now we can't go back.
Wonderful Becca.
I agree with Jeremiah; poems don't have to ryme or have perfect metre. I have gone to several poetry readings over the past semester where a poet will come and read his work. Most of the time they doesn't ryhme, the important thing is that your it is full of feeling and emotion.
As for the poem it was great. But you don't have to grow up, hang on to Mr. Pig and fly to Neverland.
Becca - Perhaps you will be the next Hoosier poet. On a different count, I would like your thoughts on a question I have posted on my blog since you are pretty good with opinions.
Good Work! I love creative writing,poems,etc. It is soooooo true. You look forward to something and then you get there and wish for the way it was. There are many things in life that aren't all they are cracked up to be. I have to say this was a lot more meaningful and special than your carrot song, but that had its place too. Love you
Great poem!!
I tought it was cute!
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